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Showing posts from July, 2011

J-A-M.....JAMAICA!

Real quick post, I will be gone for a week people. I'm going to be in Jamaica for a family reunion for a week (we're panamanian) but every two years we go different places where there's some family. That being said don't unfollow me or anything lol I'll be back in a week, I can't wait to read the new stuff when I get back, you all be good.

Supply And Demand

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My first difficulty in college came in my second semester in a class called Microeconomics. I don't think it was hard back in 06-07 I just think I didn't understand the professor well. In my first semester I took Macroeconomics, this I understood way better. What I got a great grasping on quickly was the lesson on supply and demand. I apply this theory (or fact) to a lot of things in life. I think it is especially relevant to men and women. Today I want to let ladies into many males mentalities. This will most certainly help you from getting hurt in the future, or at least be more sure of what you plan on getting into. I would like to put you on to this philosophy that there are less men and more women. Why are there less of us and more of you all? Speaking as a Black man (if you're interested in those) many of us are disproportionately incarcerated (which is a whole other ball game) and that leaves the guys like me who are free with more options I guess you can say. O...

Quick Fixes

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Lately I think I have been pushed to think about even more ideas to write about. I have gotten good feedback and suggestions from family and friends this week and I can definitely say I enjoyed everything I put out this week thoroughly. Tonight (or this morning) I speak of sweeping things under the rug. I notice within myself and in other relationships that I observe that sometimes we try to execute what I will call quick fixes. When you hear people speaking of quick fixes you think things such as drugs, or alcohol, or compulsive eating, etc. People get involved into these things and sometimes they become addictions and they're usually doing it to cover up a much more bigger and visceral issue. This is how I see quick fixes in relationships. Quick fixes manifest themselves in relationships in a few ways. Quick Fixes Being passive during arguments Making up for things with gifts Saying what you know wants to be heard (not what you believe) Doing what you know wants to be done (Not ...

Blowing The Dust Off (Mini Me Part 2)

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Today I'm simply throwing it back, and taking you people to a place that's not usually visited; not for any specific reason just coincidence. In my last post I spoke of when I would want to have a kid and the type of woman I'd want the mother of my child to be. I got pretty detailed about the characteristics, and tonight's post may give you some insight as to why. A lot of how I operate everyday, for a long time has been out of my want to do the right things, but also to be able to be opposite many of my father's negatives. Now is when you want to stay tuned... I don't speak much about my personal life outside of relationships much. My mentality has always been that someone else has a crazier story or worse story and I never wanted to come off ass "hey guys, feel sorry for me!" I'll never be that guy. But after today's little history lesson you all will learn why I am the way I am and why I'm so adamant about creating the right...

Mini Me

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Reality has been constantly setting in since my graduation. I'm currently interning at an organization that provides after school programming and mental health services for children with incarcerated parents. This is really being done out of the curiosity of this population and to build experience in the field as well. But since being finished with school for the time being, you can't help but think about the future and how close some things seem to be getting. The first real thing I plan to get is a car once I land a solid salary position. I need to make my own moves and I need my own space. Being self mobile allows all of that and it's pretty much about time. In addition to that I think about relationships, and I guess this is where it gets juicy; where the rubber meets the road. I met a special person when I was freshman in college, we clicked and for a long time all was well. One thing I admired about her was how crazy she was for her brother. She was always holding h...

Does The Thought Count?

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There's always much being said as to what is considered cheating. The topic itself gets people to really start nitpicking. There seems to be so many technicalities into what is considered cheating. I think men make things quite simple. Many of our ideas of cheating stem from anything done that is more of a physical nature. Women tend to look at it from a wider spectrum. Some actually would prefer you physically cheat rather than actually have feelings for someone. I can definitely understand that logic. But just the thought that everyone can have so many definitions of such a thing is interesting to me. You're always wondering what boundaries not to cross and everyone has their own definitions of cheating. This is when candid conversation comes in and when it can be most helpful. Today I present a unique scenario to you. This goes for both men and women and I would love your own candid feedback. If you happen to be thinking about someone else during sex with your significant ot...

Compromising Positions

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Some of the most interesting relationships to me are those that feature many mutual friends. They can be some of the most fun relationships being that there's a level of comfort in each other and who the other is hanging out with. You're probably able to go many places together, no one has to feel awkward or left out. You have mutual confidants if some issues arise; there's many pluses to this. I myself have been in relationships in which I and the person I was seeing had mutual friends, and at the time it doesn't seem like anything much. But an interesting thing happens in the event that you all break up. Not so much the break up, but the nature of that break up and if any judgments are passed. If we get into issues of abuse or infidelity and deception then you would think some mutual friends would feel compelled to choose a side. It's a pretty toxic situation and a situation i call a grown situation. What I mean is that this will be a learning experience for all ...

Look But.....

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Summer is in full swing , there's no doubt about it. As I sit here it's currently sunny outside and it's a legit 86 degrees. There's no doubt that as I love to say " the temperature goes up, the clothes comes down." Guys have a special place in their heart for the summer time. Even a winter baby like myself can't help but bow my head in appreciation of the great visuals and potentials the summer may bring. How could you hate this? Well needless to say as we all enjoy summer for many reasons, there are some fellas out there who I'm sure may find it quite challenging at times, and ladies for that matter. The summer for those who are cuffed (in a relationship) can be a beautiful time. I know if I had a significant we'd be walking on boardwalks and kicking it at wine bars and all sorts of different stuff. You all may be doing the same and that's great. If you ask me this is your time to try and do the most things being that weather is permitting m...

Foot In Your Mouth?

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If there's one flaw about me it's that as many thing as I can say right, I can say something wrong or taken wrong to totally negate it. Sometimes i have a bad way of not thinking an idea out totally, or I may misinterpret something and give the wrong response to someone. I was recently asked by someone I used to see if we could start off fresh with a clean slate. Initially I was puzzled and simply thought "What are you talking about?" As far as I was concerned I didn't have any problems with this woman and I basically thought the question didn't have much poignancy simply because of how I saw things. Her and I have been amicable and speak regularly enough that I couldn't understand the idea of starting with a clean slate. Needless to say my response didn't go over well and I think it came off more insensitive than anything else. I didn't have much time to think about it at the time being that I only had about 2 hours to sleep and then get up. But...

Hit That Fall Back Button (Courtesy : Mike Thomas)

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I guess I'll first off explain the title to this post. The phrase "Hit that fall back button" was coined by a good friend of mine named Mike Thomas. As boys (not only the two of us, but others in our circle) over the years there has been no shortage of... "activity" with women. What I mean by that is at any given point someone has something going on. It could be something good, or it could be a gripe, a headache, an argument etc. But ever since I have had relationships with women there has always been one ongoing thing that has never ceased to come up. This thing is what materializes as nagging. Now in any situation that things became too much my friend Mike would exclaim "hit that fall back button"! This pretty much means calm down and take it easy; fall back. Space is imperative, it is paramount and has to be respected. I have not had these kinds of problems myself in a very long time. I understand who I am and let people know as we get closer that...