Is B. Simone Right? Do 9-5ers and Entrepreneurs Mix Like Oil and Water?

Courtesy: The Grio

I'm not too familiar with B. Simone.

I don't know many fellas that might be either. But I do know that she has found some new success and recently took social media by storm. During an interview with Nick Cannon she stated that because of her lifestyle as an entrepreneur, she couldn't possibly date a man who worked a  9-5 job. Nick tried to make a contrary case, but she was vehemently adamant that that just wasn't her thing. Many found those thoughts to be ignorant, myself included.

I'm in no way offended by what B. Simone said. But I do think it goes to show the quality of people she has dated and how they approach relationships. As I've gotten older and dated more deliberately, I often thought about roles. Not necessarily gender roles, but simply thinking about my own qualities and talents. What am I good at? What is she good at? How can I add to her life? I feel that beyond protecting your partner or helping to provide that you have other duties as well. You should be with someone who not only supports you, but seeks to find ways of encouraging you and making your life easier.

I've written about Chris Rock's "Tambourine" in the past and this whole moment currently reminds me of it. Below is  a clip, play it around the 1:15 mark. It's where Chris states that when you're with someone, you're in the "service industry."

When I hear people say that folks working 9-5's won't understand the grind of an entrepreneur, I tend to think about the personality of said people rather than their vocation. Everyone isn't going to gel with a motivated self-employed person. Everyone doesn't gel with a litany of other personalities as well. I think people's reactions against B. Simone's sentiments were in large part them thinking that she just hasn't considered other scenarios. I also think that people believe she came off more like an elitist than anything since she has gained more notoriety recently.

Being with a person with a radically different career path I imagine being challenging. 

But if you maintain the philosophy that you are in the service industry, I think it totally changes how you operate. Thinking about how you can function in a system of serving someone allows you to be active in their life in more ways. It allows you to adjust to their needs without disdain. It allows you to think about how you can best function to see your partner succeed. I'm a king of sports analogies, here's one. Many times when two or more premier athletes join a team, it's always discussed how they would all "fit." There's always someone who has to sacrifice and amend a part of their game (talent) that they excel at. But in addition, they're asked to "buy in" to a system that can work if they give the same effort that they would've gave before joining.

If I had B. Simone's ear, I'd tell her that she needs to be more focused one someone's intentions. 

Can they articulate that without stuttering? Sure, how someone supports themselves is important. You want to have some idea of how responsible a man is. But once you can establish that, then what? Are they in the service industry? If they are, I don't think she would run into the issues that she seems very concerned about running into. Of course this is only one guy's opinion. But as for all of you, when you decide you're going to be with someone, be in their service and make sure that energy is kept by them as well.

These are my words and I make no apologies #BLM.