What I Loved About Chris Rock's "Tamborine"

I know many of us are still high off of Wakanda Carnival. We've been lucky to have not only one, but two big premiers this month. Of course Black Panther was the box office juggernaut we all hoped that it would be. But along with the finest chocolate, we were also gifted with a new Chris Rock stand up on Valentine's Day. For anyone who has followed my writing through the years, you know that I love stand up comedy. Stand ups make me laugh, but more importantly they make me think. I've alluded to Chris Rock many times prior in my writings. One of my favorite references can be read here.

I found Chris Rock's Tamborine to be his most vulnerable offering. Sure it's funny. It's very funny. In my opinion, I think Never Scared was his best work. But I genuinely had a good time watching Tamborine. This stand up gave us much of what we love about Chris. His perspectives on issues and how he dissects them are elements of his act that we feel he excels at. What I truly found watching this special was that I have never seen Chris be as accountable as he was during this stand up.

We were able to enjoy a Chris Rock speaking as sort of an elder statesman. There was a bit about halfway through where Chris begins to tell you about the "dont's" in relationships. Being newly involved with someone in a relationship, I enjoyed this commentary. I wanted to share my thoughts and how I hope to apply some of these principles.

"Love hard or get the fuck out" 

Chris alludes to his divorce and says that there isn't much room for ego in relationships. Don't taunt your partner by constantly threatening to leave. If you choose to be with someone, be deliberate about your intentions about that person. If you don't think you can fulfill that commitment, then step away.

 "Fuckin' and going places"

Apparently Chris has done extensive research here. He believes that a lot of issues in relationships could be fixed by sexing it away like Solange once alluded to. I'm not sure if this is true, but I know that I have no issue trying to figure it out. His tone is as if he's saying that we over complicate things too much. If we keep fuckin' then most shall be forgiven.

"Relationships are tough when only one person is working on it"

A lot of what Chris focused on dealt with being present with your partner. You have to make yourself available to your partner. That's an area in which he believes he fell short. You can't buy away these types of concerns in relationships. Some things do require your time; your presence. He meant this not only physically but mentally and emotionally as well.

"Stop competing" 

This resonated with me the most.  I think I stayed out of a relationship for a long time for a few reasons. One of which was because I just wanted to feel like I was bringing something to the table. Many times whether it be through dismay with my job, or just not seeing progress in the areas I wanted, I fell back. I wasn't thinking that I would be competing in a relationship that I may be in. But I didn't want to feel like the Bobby Brown of it all you know? I love Bobby. But through the duration of his marriage to Whitney, I think people viewed him as a slacker. I'm not in the business of bringing any woman down. But then again I guess this is where finding a balance is important and trying to keep your ego at bay is a must. Chris says that your partner's success is your success and vice versa. I'm inclined to agree with him.

"You are in the service industry" 

This may be his most important point of all. Being in a relationship means you're there to help make someone you're with better. You want to try and make their life easier to deal with. You do for them, and they do for you. You have to embrace giving of yourself. You have to embrace making sacrifices. Being in the service industry hearkens back to relationships being void of ego. It should be a connection based on selflessness and integrity.

I felt that these words were coming from someone who had obviously gone through it. The tone was one of wisdom but also of remorse. He simply told us to not do it how he did it. Embrace playing a role in our love's lives and play it to the best of our ability. I took that away from this special, and I'm much better for it. Now someone hand me a tambourine! Leave your thoughts below.

These are my words and I make no apologies.