What About Your Friends?


I believe men have stronger friendships with each other than women do with each other. I have a need to feel that men are more loyal to their guys than ladies are to their girls. Now let's not be fooled, the above photo isn't illustrating backstabbing women. I simply couldn't pass up putting up the picture lol, these women are fine. But anyway, for the last few weeks this has been a topic of interest on my mind. The funny thing is this has been a topic of interest on the minds of some of my guy friends as well. You see many times our experiences as men parallel one another. We find common ground make jokes and sense out of things. All of us men are intrigued by the droves of women we meet who say what seems all too usual : I don't have many girlfriends. I'll go on record and say that guys hate hearing that. Our conscience simply whispers "uh oh" once that phrase is uttered and this post will serve as to why.


Now the last thing I want to do is generalize. In all my posts I simply look to expose a scenario that I feel is relevant. There's an exception to every rule and of course this is no different. Now that the disclaimer is out of the way... why can't we all just get along? I want to know what keeps women from being completely genuine with one another. Well I'll try and take a stab at it, here are some things that I have noticed.

Issues of Female Friendship

Initial passing of judgment on other women

Friends not truly letting you know what you need to hear

Befriending people for convenience i.e. cliques, rides

People want to be wanted, that's cool and that's normal. It's no different for any of us. As I always tend to say your motives are everything in this life. Why do you yearn for the friends or attention that you do? If you're always unhappy with friends what led you to choosing them? Well I'll tell you what's important above all; you need a good support system. Find people to kick it with that have your genuine interest at heart.

Guys could care less about  judging others and what have you. Many of the groups of guy friends you encounter... how much gossiping really goes on? Well I haven't experienced much in my life. I know a lot of women are like "men talk more than women"...maybe. If you mean do we sit around and talk about women sure we do. We talk about who we like and who we don't like so much...but I mean that's pretty much it. I tend to think men have a genuine respect for one another that many women don't have for one another. To put it more clearly, I think for guys to not have a respect for each other they have to have a reason.  I've seen women knock other women for absolutely no reason at all. That's simply ridiculous. Men become friends with each other and I'm sure in hopes that they're building a strong circle around them.

When you think about it men praise each other a lot more. We gas each other up we joke, positivity breeds around us. I don't see enough women uplifting each other the same way. I'd go as far to say many women are paranoid of the friends they keep chomping at the bit waiting for one of their girls to act up. A male's circle is so much more lighthearted. This may be due to how both genders experience and deal with emotions...maybe.

So how do women having fewer female friends adversely effect men you ask? The problems women have with other women I sometimes like to think lead to many women always wanting that platonic guy friend to vent with. Women are always eager for a new  neutral guy friend. I think they understand that in some ways we are a breath of fresh air. I think that a woman not having enough female friends can also put a damper on the guy she may be seeing. I'm sure a guy can't help but feel obligated to spend more time with his girl when he knows she doesn't have much else to do. A struggle comes of this as guys always have something going on and are always hanging out and there might be a pressure to include a girl. At the same token a guy doesn't want to make a girl feel too uncomfortable around all his guys and vice versa.

A lot of dialogue can come from this and that's what I want. What's your view? My advice is to choose the most sincere person, someone who tells you the things that are uncomfortable to hear but you know is right. A friend of mine once said "Watch your circle they're starting to look a lot like squares." So separate yourself where you see fit.

Be Good.























Comments

  1. I think that what matters is the quality of the people you have around you, not the quality. If you have a lot of quality friends who you can rely on and who help to make you better then more power to you. I, personally have a small group of female friends because I find it easier to manage and those are the people I trust.

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