Damn, He Got A Point

LOVE! We can blab a whole bunch on this subject can't we? It really doesn't stop. And that's alright because love is all good. The older I get the more I see it manifested and interpreted differently by everyone. Over the weekend a friend of mine asked in our group chat if attaining a storybook sort of love was possible. Let's call it almost like a Utopian sort of thing. There were a myriad of responses. What was obvious and what I said was that love means something different to all of us. What made me love a certain woman might not mean anything to someone else, but for me it was everything. I didn't believe there was any Utopian type love. I think that initial falling in love process is extremely Utopian, damn near euphoric. But love on it's own seems so uncompromising. It lasts long, it's strong; it's like the most honest promise you make to someone else. For that reason is why you have to be frugal with whom you allow yourself to have those ...

... or so it sometimes seems. It's Friday night and I just finished having a good conversation with one of my cousins. The nature of the conversation is a pretty common one I think many men can relate to. This is the case of the newly single woman. I can't speak for anyone else but myself and I know I've faced this scenario even from my high school years. I will warn you all from now that I'm not sure if I have answers to this issue. Just bare with me and hear me out ta bien (okay)? I think men sometimes go through little phases in which they have interest in a certain woman but that woman is in a relationship. What would make matters worse is God forbid she was in a relationship and happy! When you put those two things together you take the wind out of a brotha's sails. A guy goes from wanting the girl to wanting her but feeling a little bit sour about wanting her. For all intensive purposes there's really nothing you can do. A wise man once told me a wom...

Almost gotcha there, this post is not about deadbeat dads. Those guys have gotten enough attention. Today's post is about something a bit different. I'm looking to delve into this topic of dating. A lot is made of what is proper dating etiquette. In an attempt to show everyone that chivalry is alive and well I implore you to open your mind up to this post and my next post on www.viralstatus.com . I'm an avid user and enthusiast of twitter. Pretty much daily I'm on that thing, it provides me with some insights and a whole hell of a lot of entertainment. This past week one of my homegirls sort of went on a semi rant. She stated something to the effect of a guy expecting to not pay on the first date. I found her statement intriguing. I asked her if it's something she has come across often and she said "Yes."  I then put on my "hmm" face and went and began to ask around. As it turns out, many women that I got responses from said they had run i...

Just about two months ago was my last post. I apologize for being so quiet it's been pretty hectic the past few weeks. I'm back now and trying to get back into the swing of things. I've been paying a lot of attention to myself and all these new things I'm noticing about myself emotionally as it pertains to women. Some of my fellas say I'm getting soft... I wouldn't go that far. I am however a little better at viewing things from other than my perspective. I'm hoping my writing reflects that in the future. This brings us to today where I want to touch on the issue of respect. There's a twist today though, it's not about I respect you or you respect me blah blah. This is more about how a woman can shoot herself in the foot. I'm sure we all have a good idea about the basis of respect. You have to give it to get it and what not, but do we remain cognizant of this daily? I find myself taken aback sometimes with responses I get from women about ce...

I would guess as a single male that this isn't the norm daily. By norm I mean finding your wife in lingerie as you come home from work. You see since I'm not married I can only fantasize about what my marriage would be like. Today's post is a follow up to yesterday's. Lately I've been thinking about my expectations of marriage. In my own stupid  little way it would be so cool to come home to my wife oiled up everyday like this lol. This however is unrealistic; I know this but we can all dream can't we? Have you ever gave thought to the kind of person you need in your life? What type of characteristics must one possess for you to say "this is someone I can settle with."? Today I figured I fill you in on some qualities I would look for...you ready? Humor - I have to laugh it's imperative to my life. We have to be able to have fun and act like total asses around each other.... I'm just jovial like that. Generous - I would need to be with...

If you're not aware, I'm a 23 year old male. There's a lot of things I would love to accomplish at this age and I'm working on some of them. I'm a recent college graduate so I'm learning on the job so to speak as I acclimate myself into the work force a bit. In the midst of all this you also learn about yourself. I find myself in deep thought at work when I have free time. I find myself thinking about the future. 23 is a funny age, I'm still getting many things situated and for some reason or another I feel like that should include my love life. It's been a long time since I ever made me being in a relationship a priority. I don't really think it should be one. I simply think you should want one and in the same breath be ready for what it brings. I reached a point where I've done so many things I've wanted to and now I can really give of myself to someone else. The thoughts that actually preceded my thoughts of relationship were really o...

I come today speaking on a common issue that men deal with. It's simple, I'm speaking of the woman men want to "know their place" and the women who don't want to play that part or don't know that a guy placed them in that role. OUCH! I know this is some crazy sort of topic. You are simply going to have to stomach my bluntness on this. To put thing simply a lot of guys have two types of women. They have women they don't mind dating and what not and then they have women who they really only want to have sex with. Truth is that in the latter case that's all they want to be to that woman too. Now is it ever that cut and dry? Nope. Deception runs rampant between men and women, we try to be as verbally pleasing as possible cushioning each others emotions for our own peace of mind. It pays to be clear on the kind of relationship you have with someone. The main reason why guys get upset with women who end up wanting more than what they want is because th...

You let your guard down, then POW!!! Not a nice ending right? It sure as hell isn't so today I hope to help you avoid this as much as possible. I want to talk about what I feel is trust. I had a great conversation with a friend a few weeks back where he felt as if you can never fully trust anyone. I had to disagree with him. I couldn't possibly not fully trust someone whom I think I would marry. And I thought that point was relevant enough. I simply told my boy that you have to be realistic. I truly feel that once you lose sense of what is reality you then leave yourself wide open for some sort of failure. I define trust as giving someone the opportunity to do right in whatever facet. I do not believe that trust should be synonymous with being naive. What the hell are you talking about Kahlil?! What I'm saying is that when I trust someone I don't negate the fact that they are human and that they can fuck up at any which moment. Trust is hoping you'd always use...

Priorities are something else aren't they? I was having a conversation with someone yesterday and we covered a bunch of topics. The conversation eventually progressed into an idea of mine that sometimes in your life you have to make business type decisions. I love making analogies and i suppose this is one of them. I'm 23 years old, in my own mind I believe I'm building a brand. I'm building my brand. Right now is a whole lot of groundwork being put in which began with graduating college. At this stage in the game my eyes are open to opportunity, this is the time to do my dibbling and dabbling. With all that being said, it is my belief that in life you have to have the wisdom to know what will give you the best opportunity to succeed at certain times. To be more clear I'm saying that there are times where you have to cut certain things or people from your life in order to handle business. By saying business I mean anything you're trying to achieve or any ob...

So what do we see above? I'll caption this for you perfectly in a short story... enjoy. Above you see Vanessa and Kobe Bryant at a press conference. If I'm not mistaking this is taking place during the 03-04 season while the Lakers were pursuing an unprecedented 4th straight NBA championship. The Lakers were long time  my team. This particular season you would say that the Lakers had an all star starting line up and were a shoe in for their title. Their starting line up consisted of 4 sure fire first ballot hall of famers. We're talking about Kobe Bryant, Gary Payton, Karl Malone, and Shaquille O'Neal. If you didn't watch basketball you've still probably heard these names. I've gone on this tangent to tell you that in the above photo Vanessa Bryant is supporting her man in the 03-04 season during a press conference where Kobe claims his innocence of a rape charge. Here's the catch, he said that the sex was consensual. Thus meaning he cheated on his...

I believe men have stronger friendships with each other than women do with each other. I have a need to feel that men are more loyal to their guys than ladies are to their girls. Now let's not be fooled, the above photo isn't illustrating backstabbing women. I simply couldn't pass up putting up the picture lol, these women are fine. But anyway, for the last few weeks this has been a topic of interest on my mind. The funny thing is this has been a topic of interest on the minds of some of my guy friends as well. You see many times our experiences as men parallel one another. We find common ground make jokes and sense out of things. All of us men are intrigued by the droves of women we meet who say what seems all too usual : I don't have many girlfriends. I'll go on record and say that guys hate hearing that. Our conscience simply whispers "uh oh" once that phrase is uttered and this post will serve as to why. Now the last thing I want to do is general...

I suffer from a problem ladies and gentlemen. As a matter of fact many of us men suffer from a problem. I will go on record and say that by standards of "machismo" this will be one of my most sappiest posts yet. I do feel it is important though to get inside the psyche of a "good guy." Some might even call me too good. But for every victory is a story and to every madness there's a method. My story might be similar to many. And today I want you to see the real struggle it is walking the line of being too good or soft of a guy, and being complete asshole. This was more of a disclaimer than an introduction... but y'all bear with the kid. My early childhood was quite hectic. I wouldn't change it for nothing as I did so much shit that people my age now still haven't done. I was able to travel, and i was really fortunate enough to have a warm family. I'm lucky for that, and I'm always appreciative. But there was another side of my childhood...

A long time ago I wrote a Post called "Do Nice Guys Really Finish Last?" In that Post I briefly talked about whether or not being a "nice guy" was essentially a detriment. In the long run it isn't. For some reason I think this post relates to it somewhat. I think they intertwine somewhere. But I speak today of a situation in which I think so many of us have been in at one point of another. If anything it shows great vulnerability to even speak about it, but it has it's relevance. Have you ever broke up with someone just to see them move on into worse situations? Ever think to yourself well damn at least upgrade? Well thanks to good ol' Beyonce'  she gave many women an anthem when she dropped "Upgrade You." Nevertheless the philosophy makes a heck of a lot  of sense. It may be one of the worst feelings when someone else is chosen over you, or you lose someone to someone else whom you feel isn't worthy by any means. For some of you...

"Even though I'm doing wrong girl, you can never move along girl." That's a statement full of moxy isn't it? Today I wanted to break down a song for you all. The song is off Trey Songz new mixtape called Anticipation 2. Anticipation originally came about as some material he was releasing before his third album "Ready." Well The first Anticipation mixtape was amazing, and in this new project he has a few songs that serve as sequels to their predecessor. One of these songs is called "Me 4 U" Infidelity part 2. Allow me to briefly paint the picture of the concept for you. The first song off the first mixtape was called "Infidelity" and it's pretty much Trey or the character he's describing showing appreciation for a woman who stuck with him through all the mess he put her through. He goes onto to actually say that the woman deserves someone better than him. Sounds fair enough right? Well in what I would call damn near the best...